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To Jesuisquoi:

1. Going to the doctor is not a selfish act.
2. Doctors are the ones who decide how to manage their time. It is them who judge who needs a 2-minute appointment or a longer appointment.
If he had thought you were too long, he would have put an end to this appointment earlier. He didn’t so he judged that he needed all the time he spent with you.
3. Excellent thing to be honest with him. Excellent.
4. Telling them that you are not in immediate danger is absolutely not a satisfying answer. Why? Because *your* perception of the seriousness of your situation is blurred by your depression. You tell them your plan and *they* say if you’re in immediate danger or not.
5. Why don’t you want to tell them your plan? What are you afraid of? I don’t understand why you don’t want to tell people. What do you think people will do once they know??
6. Crying. I cried too at the 5th session I think. It is normal. We have to dump all our emotions. There is nothing to be ashamed of. It is normal. I didn’t want to cry either but they told me I could and even that I should. In our group session, girls cry. Three of them cried already. It’s okay to cry.
7. Why do you always say that people don’t believe you? I believe you. I haven’t seen you really. I haven’t seen your cuts nor really heard you speaking but I believe you. So why do you think that professionals, who are used to see people like you, would not believe you? Trust them.
8. Again, he told you what I told you. When you feel bad, call someone. Your doctor – he’s nice – or somebody else but don’t stay alone. Call. It is absolutely not a selfish act.
9. Good thing that they increased the dose of meds. Hopefully you’ll notice some differences.

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  1. June 26, 2009 at 9:52 pm

    Aw, you’ve made me feel so much better :).
    I’m embarrassed about my plans! I’m scared that I think it’s foolproof, and someone else spots obvious flaws in it and i’ll feel stupid.
    I think people don’t believe because, it’s strange, but to meet me i’m an incredibly cheerful person. Honestly it’s so strange. Because of my anxiety I come across as really happy and laughing and stuff. And I generally just don’t expect people to believe me!
    :)

    • June 26, 2009 at 10:46 pm

      Well every plans can fail. Do you know that the bad Nazi general in the movie Schindler’s List was hanged 3 times: the first two attempts failed.
      http://tadashi-daiba.livejournal.com/115856.html
      You can tell me your plan. To me.
      Oh, I was smiling, happy when I was telling the therapists how I would kill myself and when. I looked okay. I sounded okay. But if you’d listened to what I said, you’d freak out.
      Trust them. Or better: tell them what you just told me! and that it worries you.

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